"I Love Jesus, But..." – What Kind of Church Are We Building?
Why People Feel This Way, and What We Can Do About It
I’m thankful for my friend Wilson Adams and his courage to share raw, honest words from people who are hurting. His recent Facebook post gave voice to those who feel distant from church, not because they’ve given up on Jesus, but because they feel like the church has given up on them. View Wilson’s post here:
https://www.facebook.com/share/p/14JdgnbNJt9/
We’ve all heard it: “I love Jesus, but not the church.” And it stings, because Jesus and His church are inseparable (Ephesians 5:25). But instead of getting defensive, we need to ask why people feel this way—and what we can do about it.
Too often, churches have become places where people feel the need to hide—hide their pain, their doubts, their struggles, their past. The fear of being judged or dismissed often prompts people to remain silent. And silence leads to isolation.
But this is not what Jesus wanted for His people.
What Should the Church Be Like?
Let’s look at what Scripture says:
1. The church should be a safe place to confess and find healing.
“Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, so that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)
Confession only happens where trust exists. That means we need churches where people feel safe being real, where struggles aren’t met with shame but with prayer.
2. The church should be a community of burden-bearers.
“Carry one another’s burdens; in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” (Galatians 6:2)
Life is heavy. Addictions, marriage trouble, mental illness, and parenting crises aren’t signs of failure. They’re cries for help. And that’s when the church should shine.
3. The church should welcome the broken.
Jesus was drawn to the outcasts.
“It is not those who are well who need a doctor, but those who are sick.” (Luke 5:31)
We say we want to be like Jesus, but are we drawing near to the sick and the struggling the way He did?
4. The church should be humble.
“All of you clothe yourselves with humility toward one another.” (1 Peter 5:5)
Humility keeps us from becoming the “99” who look down on the “one” who doesn’t fit. It reminds us that we all need grace every day.
This Is the Key to Church Growth and Vibrance
People aren’t looking for a place to be reminded how right we are compared to how wrong everyone else is. They’re hungry for a place to belong. A place where they can stop pretending. A place where they’re loved, not fixed. Heard, not dismissed.
Churches that grow, really grow, aren’t the ones with the best programs or sharpest branding. They’re the ones that feel like home. Where people say, “This is where I finally found grace.”
Want to build a strong, vibrant church? Start with this:
Make room… for the messy.
Give people space to heal.
Stop comparing and start listening.
Focus less on being right and more on being like Jesus.
The result? People open their hearts. They bring their friends. They stay. They grow.
A Final Word
We can’t fix every church culture overnight. But we can start with our hearts, our pew, our conversations.
Let’s be the kind of people who listen, who care, who speak life, not shame. Let’s build churches where it’s safe to struggle and where healing is real.
“Above all, maintain constant love for one another, since love covers a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8)
