This week has shown me something I already knew, but maybe needed to see again: we are living in a very challenging time. You can feel it. Dark clouds seem to be forming over the brotherhood, and if we’re not careful, a storm could break. This hasn’t happened overnight. For the better part of a decade, things have risen and fallen, cooled and flared, but over the last couple of years, the temperature has climbed in a noticeable way. I don’t say that with any sense of glee, and I’m not trying to manufacture a crisis. I’m simply being honest about what I’m seeing, and I know I’m not the only one who feels it.
Why Debate Isn’t the Answer Right Now
Almost every other day, I receive a debate challenge. I’ve literally been called a coward by another preacher for refusing public debate. But the last thing we need right now is another argument, another round of strife, more labeling, more posturing. Some people thrive on controversy, but Scripture warns against that spirit. Paul told Titus to “avoid foolish debates… because they are unprofitable and worthless” (Titus 3:9). And honestly, if you saw some of the propositions that have been sent my way, you’d be amazed. I couldn’t in good conscience affirm them, because I don’t believe what they’re demanding I argue for. We don’t need more noise. We don’t need more heat. We need people who will steady the church, not stir it. My goal is simple: I want to be one small voice among the many who are trying to help us move toward peace, not deeper into division.
The Church Isn’t the Problem
While many are definitely frustrated, know this: the answer is not to leave the church, nor is it to throw up our hands in despair. The church is not the problem. Imperfect, flawed, sinful humans are. And that includes every one of us.
The answer is to anchor ourselves again in who we are, and to set the example God calls us to place.
Public Conversations Have Limits
Before I say more, I want to acknowledge something one brother shared with me last night. He reminded me that public conversations can drift in directions we never intended. People bring their wounds into the comments. They remember old hurts. They generalize. They vent. And sometimes what was meant to call us back to humility and gentleness becomes a springboard for frustration. He’s right to point that out. Public forums can’t carry the whole weight of reconciliation. They can encourage reflection, but they can’t heal everything.
A Needed Look in the Mirror
That reminder doesn’t weaken what we’ve talked about this week; it sharpens it. It has also forced me to look in the mirror. I can see places in my past where I didn’t handle this perfectly. I’ve said things too quickly. I’ve spoken out of frustration. I’ve let my own discouragement spill into the conversation. I regret that, and I want to do better going forward. If the goal is unity, then we have to guard every side of this, myself included. We can’t call for gentleness while using our platforms to rehearse grievances. We can’t preach love while assuming the worst about each other. And we can’t talk about preserving unity while speaking in ways that tear it apart.
Where We Go From Here
We return to the basics — the things Scripture has told us all along.
Remember who we are.
We are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus (Galatians 3:26-28). We share “one Lord, one faith, one baptism” (Ephesians 4:5). Unity begins with identity. When we remember we are family, love becomes the natural posture.
Look for the places where we agree.
Paul urged the church to “agree in the Lord” (Philippians 4:2) and to be “perfectly united in mind and thought” (1 Corinthians 1:10). That doesn’t mean uniformity; it means choosing to stand together on common ground laid by Scripture.
Choose to operate from love — not suspicion.
“Love believes all things” (1 Corinthians 13:7). Love gives the benefit of the doubt. Love refuses to assume motives. Love “covers a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8) rather than opening fresh wounds.
Choose forgiveness — even when it hasn’t been requested.
Jesus said, “If you have anything against anyone, forgive him” (Mark 11:25). Paul echoed it: “Forgive one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ” (Ephesians 4:32). Forgiveness frees the wounded heart, even when no apology comes.
Pursue peace and the things that build up.
“Pursue peace with everyone” (Hebrews 12:14). Paul adds, “Let us pursue what promotes peace and what builds up one another” (Romans 14:19). Peace isn’t passive. It is something we chase, protect, and practice.
And yes — be honest about this:
Some will refuse this path. Paul warned that some would be “divisive” (Titus 3:10) and that we should “watch out” for those who stir conflict (Romans 16:17). Their choices will eventually reveal them. But their path need not become ours. We follow the road Christ laid out.
Choosing the Better Way
Even though the clouds have descended, the storm doesn’t have to come. It is not inevitable. The One who is in us is greater than the one who is in the world. Let’s be praying for the Lord’s will to be done and for unity to prevail. And, as for us, let’s choose the better way.
Let’s set the tone.
Let’s model peace.
Let’s refuse the bitterness that’s swallowing so many today.
Let’s show our young people, and each other, what it means to walk worthy of our calling: “with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:2-3).
Unity isn’t kept by silence or shouting. Unity is kept by love. And love still works.
Now, go out and enjoy the weekend. Thanksgiving week is next week. Make time for your family and for the Lord on Sunday. Embrace your brethren. Look for the positive, because that is what our Lord would do.
